TIME OUT!

Weariness is the order of the day
And although rest is the prescription to overcome this exhaustion
It seems that it cannot be afforded as life demands that I still work
And hustle, and persist
Else I’m labeled indolent

Can I turn off the scene of dangling list in my head?
And check-in to a tranquil retreat
Without feeling guilty for a time-out
From work and responsibilities and doing

Or maybe that’s all a false premise
Rest can in fact be afforded while work will always be there

A refreshed soul will yield better than one that is spent. We all know this but recently I’ve felt guilty for wanting to rest because there is a pile of things I owe myself to do this year and we entered the sixth month of MMXXIII — JUNE already (*screams in Yoruba). Everyone says ‘Gbemi, you just graduated with a double masters! You should rest and “chop up”.’ While I understand everyone’s sentiment and in fact want a retreat, I feel like I cannot afford it.

It’s like the cycle never ends being an adult — needing to figure out work, and packing and moving and setting up in a new place and getting back to the artist’s flow and making life altering decisions. Knowing myself — if these things aren’t done/checked off, they will be at the front of my mind rendering me restless so at several moments of the day I really just want to yell a TIME OUT and turn my thoughts off.

But then I remember Matthew 6:25 — “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?”. That’s some bold faith that’s being required of me but reality is I cannot be afraid to rest or keeping worrying about tomorrow’s tomorrow.

So today, I chose to use Medium as the medium by which I shift my perspective and surrender my list and goals and plans and all the cool big things I yearn to achieve for rest. I trade it for rest. I trade surrender for rest in belief that the outcomes I desire will come one way or the other in some shape or form.

with hope that I’ll actually rest,
gbems 🤍

“If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers — most of which are never even seen — don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” Matthew 6:30–33 MSG